Women: Are You a Compulsive Spender?

Are You a Compulsive Spender?    

Take this short quiz*:

1) Do you shop, (in stores or on the net) to escape feeling stressed**, bored, lonely, empty, defeated, angry or scared?

2) After a setback or disappointment, does it feel like spending money will help you feel better? (It does, temporarily.)

3) Does your shopping or spending create conflicts for you, or between you and others?

4) When you shop or buy something, does your mood change?

5) Are you unable to enjoy your purchases because you feel guilty or bad?

If you answered YES to any of these you may be using money or shopping as a way to regulate your feelings or self-esteem.

First of all, good for you for taking time to get honest. Have you tried any of these to change your behavior? Promised to never overspend again to a spouse or yourself? Cut up your credit cards? One woman froze hers. That’s a pretty good in-between strategy and works similarly to not keeping sweets in the house when dieting and slowing down the time between "gotta have it" and buying creates more choice).

But creating superficial limitations are bandaids on spending problems. The real solution comes from dealing with the feelings that are driving the behavior and by being willing to explore your relationship with money.

Try this:  Next time you want to shop put the PAUSE BUTTON** into effect and check in with yourself before you go shopping. Ask: Am I stressed, bored, or anxious?  If so, about what?  Notice where in your body you the feelings are – belly, head, heart? Then take 10 deep breaths and with each exhale imagine breathing out the uncomfortable feelings.  Then, decide if you want to shop or not, and try to stay conscious of how much your budget allows.  Next Step: Find out what drives your money story.

Wall Street Bankers Raped World Money System

The definition of rape is usually associated with a woman being physically forced to have sex. However, it is also "an act of plunder, violent seizure or abuse; as in the rape of the countryside," or in this case the rape of our world money system. Though hundreds around the world invested in the credit default swap market, 15 Hedge Fund managers went ALL IN and placed enormous bets that American finance would go up in flames. In other words they bet that the easy finance house of cards bank created would collapse and they could cash in. That's exactly what happened. Even though these financiers were betting against us, a few tried to warn Bear Stearns and later the goverrnements about what was coming.  But, the ostrich phenomenon kept everyone from listening, or most importantly, taking action, until it was too late.

The very sad and still scary part of this story is that the fall is far from over. The world economy has never had the kind of debt it now has. For example: in 2002 world debt went from $84 trillion to $195 trillion. To give you some understanding of the numbers: Ireland's debts were more than 25X it's tax revenues. Spain and France 10X annual tax revenues. No where to go financially but down. Iceland, (I'll blog separately about the lessons from that country) ended up with debts amounting to 850% of their GDP. The U.S. 350%.  Yow!!

If you haven't understood what exactly happened to put the money world in the predicament we're in, then read Michael Lewis' "Boomerang." He concisely explains the series of events that led us to the precipice we're on. Events that were predicted back in 2004. Here's a quick summary: In 2004 Wall Street created the credit default swap which enabled investors to bet against the price of any given bond - to "short" it. This is like default insurance on another person's investment. 

The Solution to our world financial crisis? No one really knows. But it's interesting that the "Occupy Wall Street" Marches have sprung up and people are waking up to the fact that SOMETHING different needs to occur with our financial system and the way corporations plunder while everyday folks suffer the effects. What do you think?